Deciding to be married at Hexham Abbey is choosing to begin your married life with an act of Christian Worship during which you make your commitment to each other and ask for God’s blessing on your relationship. As such you are not ‘hiring’ a building for the day but adding your page to the Abbey’s 1,300 year history. The Clergy will guide your preparations and they should be consulted about your plans at an early stage.

We would like to invite you, as part of your marriage preparation, to come to church services and to get used to the life and worship of our church community. We see this as essential and part of our joint commitment to you being married at Hexham Abbey. We would also be delighted if you would like to attend with family or friends.

If one of you:

• has at any time lived in Hexham parish for a period of at least 6 months, or
• was baptised in this parish, or
• was prepared for confirmation here, or
• has at any time regularly gone to normal church services in Hexham Abbey for a period of at least 6 months, or

that one of your parents, at any time after you were born:

• has lived in the parish for a period of at least 6 months, or
• has regularly gone to normal church services in Hexham Abbey for a period of at least 6 months, or

that one of your parents or grandparents:

• was married here

then you can be married here by Banns. There is no need for you to contact the Registrar or anyone else as Church of England clergy legally act as Registrars at marriages in parish churches. The Banns will normally be read in the Abbey in the period before the wedding at the 10.00am service on three successive Sundays.

If either of you live in another parish they will need to be read in that parish too within the three months before the wedding and the clergy here must have the banns certificate from your parish before the wedding takes place. It is your responsibility to see to this.

You will be informed as to the dates when your Banns are to be read at the Abbey and we would encourage you, perhaps with friends or family, to come to hear them being read.

There are alternatives to Banns which the clergy can explain.

If you are likely to change your address, please contact the Parish Office as soon as possible.

If one, or both, has been divorced and wish to be married in the Abbey they should discuss things with the Abbey Clergy before making further arrangements. The Abbey follows guidelines issued by the Church of England to help you reflect on the issues involved. This reflection will happen before a firm booking can be completed.

There is usually an initial meeting with one of the clergy to fill in a booking form and where you will have received this booklet.

In January each year couples are usually told who will be conducting their forthcoming wedding. That member of the clergy will then become the primary contact for the couple and will normally see the couple two or three times; one or two longer sessions to go through the service and talk about marriage and relationships; and normally a short rehearsal with others taking part.

The Clergy person who is conducting your service will work with you on the content. However, we highly recommend that you use the following Church of England website which has lots of good ideas and help:

www.yourchurchwedding.org

Whoever is conducting your wedding will arrange with you a convenient time some point during the week leading up to your wedding for a short run through with you in the Abbey. On this occasion it is good to have other participants present if possible: the Best Man, the Bride’s father, the bridesmaids, etc.

The service, including the signing of the Register, takes approximately 45 minutes and legally it must take place between 8.00am and 6.00pm. Weddings can be held on any day of the week. It is important that we begin punctually as there are many people involved in the service who may have difficulties if things run late. The length of time the photographer takes after the service is far more variable, and that is a factor which will govern relative timings of the service in church and the beginning of your reception.

When agreeing with you the date and time of your wedding the clergy need to take into account existing commitments in the Abbey and the time that will be needed for setting things up for you. Therefore, it is helpful to come with some options.

We normally have two or three hymns at a wedding service and a very wide range of hymns is perfectly suitable. Do not feel restricted by what someone else has had. The clergy will be glad to give advice and some suggestions are given at the back of this booklet. For a small charge the Parish Office can produce orders of service which are laid out in the style of service we use and are a wonderful keepsake.

Michael Haynes, the Director of Music, will be very happy to talk with you about music for your wedding. He may arrange to see you at the Abbey when he can demonstrate some of the possibilities. Please make an appointment directly with him.

Our choir is usually available to sing at weddings and the Director of Music can advise on their repertoire and fees.

We do not allow photographs to be taken during the prayers or the promises as they detract from the meaning of the service. However, your photographer is welcome to take pictures as you enter and leave the Abbey and during the signing of the Register. Some photographers will try hard to make you fit in with their wishes. Remember that you are paying them to fit in with yours, and insist that they meet your requirements. In this pack is a letter for photographers outlining our requirements and we ask that you give this to them.

It is possible for you to make a video recording of your wedding in Hexham Abbey. There are additional fees payable to the musicians and you will need to sign an indemnity form. The company and any individuals recording a video will need to obtain the relevant licences.

We are privileged at Hexham Abbey to have a group of talented people who arrange flowers. Our flower arrangers give of their time as well as providing oasis/sundries so there is a small fee of 25% of the cost of the flowers for undertaking the arranging – this money is then used to provide flowers in the Abbey during other times of the year.

We permit, with supervision, professional florists to provide displays. Please contact Mrs Sheila Dance directly about your requirements, including the suggested colour scheme, and she can provide you with relevant costs. It is customary that flowers are left in the Abbey for others to enjoy during the following week and so to give thanks for your wedding.

Where there are two or more weddings over a weekend we encourage Brides to talk to each other so as to come up with a common theme and therefore share the costs.

We are happy to discuss your ideas about inviting a friend or relative to read at your wedding, instrumentalists to play, or other people to have a part in the proceedings. Please discuss these things with the Clergy when we plan your wedding with you.

Confetti is brilliant fun at a wedding but, please, only throw it outside in the street.

The Church fees for your wedding include amounts laid down by Parliament and the extras you have asked for. We will send you an invoice for these amounts and the invoice needs to be paid prior to the wedding.

The clergy are happy to talk to you, generally at the initial meeting, about the costs involved. The fees for 2011 are as follows. These are likely to increase on an annual basis.

Service without Music	£322
Service with Organ	from £407
Service with Boys Choir	from £712
Service with Full Choir	from £872
Blessing of a civil marriage	from £196
Banns Publication	£22
Marriage Certificate	£3.50
Bells	£120
Video Licence	£50
Orders of Service sheets	from £40

• Fee levels may vary dependent on complexity of musical requirements.
• If a video of the service is made, then a musician’s performance charge will be added.

Hexham Abbey has a peal of 10 bells and the bell ringers are happy to ring for weddings. The bells are usually rung for approximately 20 minutes at the end of the wedding and can very much enhance the occasion as well as being very traditional. Details of the fees are given above and the bells should be booked with the Abbey’s Administrator as early as possible.

Hymns and songs:

There are very few hymns written specifically for weddings, and they are not well known. Hymns praising God, or about the love of God, are very suitable, as are some hymns of prayer. Here are some suggestions.

Praise my soul the King of heaven
A hymn of praise to God for His care of us, and a prayer for Him to look after us.

The Lord’s my shepherd I’ll not want
A version of Psalm 23, which is a hymn reminding us of God’s care to us through good and bad times.

Love divine all loves excelling
A hymn offering ourselves to Jesus, asking Him to change us, and help us to live our lives in praise of Him.

Now thank we all our God
A hymn of praise to God for His care of us, and a prayer for Him to look after us.

Come down O love divine
A hymn in which we open our hearts to God the Holy Spirit, to fill us full of love.

Father, hear the prayer we offer
A hymn of prayer admitting that the challenging ways of life will bring more fruit than the easy ones.

For the beauty of the earth
We praise God for all his blessings in many ways, not least for marriage and family life.

Other popular hymns and songs

All things bright and beautiful
At the name of Jesus
Be thou my vision
Dear Lord and Father of mankind
Father I place into your hands
Give me joy in my heart, Sing Hosanna
Great is thy faithfulness
Immortal, Invisible
Lord for the years
Lord of all hopefulness
Make me a channel of your peace
Morning has broken
O perfect love
O praise ye the Lord
O worship the King
Praise to the Lord the almighty
The King of love my shepherd is
To God be the glory

Music for your wedding

There is a wide range of music available for you to choose from. We suggest you discuss this with the Director of Music. The following is a selection of the more popular traditional pieces.

For the entry of the Bride to church (processional)

Bridal march from Lohengrin (Wagner)
March from ‘Aida’ (Verdi)
Trumpet tune (Purcell)
Trumpet Voluntary (J. Clark)
Arrival of the Queen of Sheba (Handel)
Now thank we all our God (Karg-Elert)

As the married couple leave the church (recessional)

Wedding march (Mendelssohn)
Toccata (Widor)

During the signing of the Register

The organ may play some suitable music or the Choir sing an anthem – usually 4 or 5 minutes in length.

It is possible to have two or three readings at your wedding, one of which should be from the Bible. It is important that you discuss what you are thinking about with the clergy as all readings must be appropriate for an act of Christian worship. Try to find readings that speak to you in your situation. Commonly used Bible readings include:

Old Testament

Genesis 1.26-28
Song of Solomon 2.10-13; 8.6, 7
Jeremiah 31.31-34
Psalm 67
Psalm 121

Epistle

Romans 12.1, 2, 9-13
Romans 15.1-3, 5-7, 13
1 Corinthians 13
Ephesians 4.1-6
Philippians 4.4-9
Colossians 3.12-17
1 John 4.7-12

Gospel

Matthew 5.1-10
Matthew 7.21,24-end
John 2.1-11
John 15.9-17

The clergy at Hexham Abbey are:

Canon Graham B Usher (Rector)
Revd Joanna Anderson (Associate Priest)
Revd Alan Currie (Assistant Priest)

and they are supported by a number of retired priests. Contact is via the Parish Office (01434 602031)

For arrangements about your wedding:

Jane Musto (Abbey Administrator) 01434 602031
email: admin@hexhamabbey.org.uk

For flowers for your wedding:

Sheila Dance (Flower co-ordinator) 01434 607335

For music:

Michael Haynes (Director of Music) 01434 606169
email: michaelhaynes@btopenworld.com